November 16, 2013

Being Attractive...Eww.

So, the other day, I was sitting in my AP (stands for advanced placement) Language and Composition class and we were given the prompt "What does it mean to be attractive?" We only had about 5 minutes to informally respond to this, but as the class progressed I began to think about it a little more. We went to the computer lab to type a final, formal draft of any of our prompted journal writes so far this year: so I chose this one.
And.....ladies and gents, I present to you...my response.

What does it mean to be attractive?

This is a topic many people do not talk about in public simply because the term ‘attractive’ is subjective to opinion. There is no ‘right or wrong’ answer when asked this controversial question. The world has one opinion of what attractive people look like. For women, she has medium sized breasts, substantially long legs, a slender frame and lean build.

Once you have the basics down, you can “dress her up” however you want: blonde hair or brown hair, blue eyes or green eyes, freckles or no freckles. It sounds reasonable, but in reality, the ratio of people who have the genetic composition to possibly look like that to the people who actually look like that is astonishingly disappointing. The world’s opinion of an attractive man is also seemingly reasonable, yet completely overrated. He has short-looking hair (probably spiked up with Axe hair-gel or something); he would be tall, somewhere between six and six and a half feet, broad shoulders, and sculpted pectoral and abdominal muscles.

It is so easy to identify and ‘accept’ these opinions of what an attractive person looks like because that is what we see all the time, no matter where we are or what we are doing.
People will argue that because these images and ideas are so widely spread that they must be true, and we can either accept them, or lie to make ourselves feel better. Others will argue that everyone is attractive in their own way and that no one should ever tell anyone else that they are not attractive. Well, both sides are full of it.

You can’t answer one way or the other. If you only care about being physically attractive, then argument one would be more logically reasonable; if you only care about being mentally attractive (i.e. having an attractive personality, shared sense of humor and reason-based opinions, etc.), then argument two is much more logical. But the reality is, that not one person on this planet, or any other for that matter, cares solely about one type over the other, meaning that they would look only at being physically attractive or only being mentally attractive. It is impossible to think that way. We are human beings, and we desire to be completely desired by one other person; we want that one person to want every part of us, physically and mentally. We desire to want someone in both aspects as well. If a female was solely physically attracted to a male, but he was aggressive and beat her, or had multiple affairs going on with numerous other females, the original female would be so ‘turned off’ that she would no longer be attracted to him. Most people in current times would call this male some vulgar names and use awful descriptions. Do not mistake me, this is a two-way street here. A male could be just as easily attracted to a female, and she would just as likely be aggressive and abuse him, or have multiple affairs with other men and the original would be horrified by this females actions! It is implausible to believe that people, human beings, can equate the whole meaning of the word ‘attractive’, with part of the definition or the other.

Being attractive is discovering that someone else on this planet thinks and feels the same things you do; that someone else on this Earth has common interests, and a similar sense of humor. Finding someone to be attractive means to find someone to be in unison with you--not a carbon copy, but a companion, a significant other. Being ‘attractive’ is a universal idea that no one can define because of the human interactions and desires associated with the idea.

November 2, 2013

Here It Is.

Alright all you lovely Canadians (and those remaining faithful Americans). I've been gone for a really time; I'm sorry I have not been here like I promised you I would be. I am so sorry. But I'm back now, and I hope that it's not to late to try and fix this. Infamously, I announce my disclaimer: nothing in this blog post or any other post (reposted or original) is intended to be hurtful, offensive, degrading, etc. This blog is my personal space, and I choose to share it with you all who choose to read it. Thank you for your understanding and patience.


I've had to read the play-version of The Crucible for my AP (advanced placement) English class. For those of you who don't know, it's about the Salem witch trials of 1692, and Arthur Miller (the play write of the play) wrote it during the Red Scare of the 1950's and '60's to show the relation between the paranoia of the 1600's, and the continuance of ignorance and selfishness that still exists to this very day.

The town/village that the play takes place in is a  strictly puritan community. The children are not permitted to speak to unless spoken to first, and admitting you did  something wrong, or 'confessing your sins', is WORSE than whatever it is that you did wrong. It doesn't matter what you do, if you are not perfect, than you are forever worthless and shameful. Let me tell you something, folks: that idea, that way of thinking, has NOT changed in some people.

I live this way every day, and I am not a puritan. As some of you know, I am a Christian. And I believe that God forgives me of my sins when I confess them, and that He wants to help me; that He loves me and cares for me.

I come home from school, and no one but my boyfriend of 5 years says anything to me. Everyone else ignores me. Like I am not even in the room. I go upstairs to put my stuff down, and take out my homework, and after a few minutes, my mom (of course), yells to me to come downstairs and says that I hide in my room and never come down or acknowledge that there are other people living in the house. Her boyfriend, whom we shall call K, treats me and apparently tells my mom that he thinks I'm basically a piece of sh*t, that I'm irresponsible, dimwitted, and that I do whatever I want with no regard for anyone else. Oh, and that I use everyone to get what I want. Kind of like a prostitute. SO...

I sit here, mute and still. Afraid that if I move, I will set someone off some how, and that I will not be able to make it better. And I don't want people to get mad at me, or upset with me; I most certainly don't want them getting upset with me and taking it out on J (my boyfriend mentioned above ^^ ).

I fought tooth and nail for him to be able to live here because it wasn't working where he was, and his parents didn't want him (ironic, huh?); and now he's stuck here in the middle of all of this, and I brought him here. Because I was selfish and just wanted to be with him all the time. I didn't think what would happen, or what it would do to him. I just wanted to be with him. And it's hurting him more than it's helping him.

What the hell do I do?






Have you ever felt like nothing you do is ever good enough? Like it doesn't matter how well you do in school, how hard you work at your job, or how much you love someone, it's just never good enough? And the more you try, the worse it gets?

No?


Okay.


Thanks for listening.


I'm going to try to sleep now.

Maybe not.